Stagnant. Completely utterly stagnant. I neither gained, nor lost a single ounce this week. So let’s recap, shall we? Last week I decided that I would only eat snacks at night if I both drank 3 glasses of water AND exercised. I did that. I exercised EVERY DAMN NIGHT, got my 3 glasses of water and in my humble opinion didn’t overdo the snacking thing…

At least, I don’t think I did. Okay so maybe that chai frappucino and pumpkin muffin at Starbucks didn’t exactly qualify yesterday but it WAS after hours of walking through the mall and several other stores and I was fatigued, yo. Yo…

Last week I rented Big Girls Yoga aka Yoga For Fat Chicks Just My Size Yoga from Netflix. And while I liked it a lot better than the 10 Minute Fat Blasting Dance Mix, and thoroughly enjoyed making snarky comments about the onepiece body suit that the DVD instructor was wearing (picture a powder blue version of the Oops I Did It Again outfit that Britney wore except on YOU (or the fat you, if you are one of those strangy skinny creatures I keep hearing about). And I mean, all snarkiness aside, it was a pretty good DVD, the yoga poses were kind of just my speed and some were harder than you’d guess they’d be.

BUT I don’t think it can count as a weight loss session, as it’s simply too slow and drawn out – I mean overtime, paired with a cardio workout, sure, but to rent for a day or two from Netflix? I hardly think I lost any ounces from that. But it was neat and now I know how to be a Magestic Tree and a Warrior and a Starfish and a Dog – and my son, he is an excellent little yogi – he did the DVD with me the first time and did a better job than me!! Two year olds are just natural at the Bend In Impossible Directions and Act Like a Dog workouts, I guess. Go figure.

Other than that, I also took a walk or two outside and did a couple sessions on my Evil Step Machine Midget, which I think is hurting my knees. That thing was amazing when I tried it out for 30 seconds in Brookstone, but after about 2 minutes on it, you kind of want to die, or at least make IT die. I’m kind of disappointed in myself for getting in the first place – don’t tell my husband.

And okay, if I want to be honest with myself, I’ve been a bit luxuriant in my snackage – I mean no worse than normal, but I’m supposed to be dieting so I guess I can’t call that successful. And I totally made dh buy me Sour Cream and Onion Wachusett potato chips so I guess you could say, “Wow Jen, you didn’t lose any weight? I wonder why, dumbass.” (my swear rating is just sky rocketing in this post – I’ll be rated PG 13 any secod now)

So I guess I should have a game plan and guess what, I kind of do. I decided the other day while rocking out to the music in my head while doing dishes, that I should try kick boxing (I think the song playing in my head was that, “I’m gonna knock you out” song – you know the one I mean, right? I have no idea why it was there but it was FUN) so I hopped on Netflix to see if they made DVDs for that and wouldn’t you know, of course they do so I’m planning to try the 10 Minutes Solution: Kickboxing Bootcamp. That sounds much more like cardio and I get to kick things, right? That sounds fun to me – I can pretend I’m a secret agent ninja pirate training up for my next big duel… or something.

This week our fearless leader Jen @ Daily Mish Mash had slightly better results than me – she lost 2 pounds! This week she wants us to make three mini goals and list any rewards plans we want to set in place.

My goals for this week are:

1. To work out at least four times this week, fifteen minutes for each workout at least (which means my 2 minutes on the step machine won’t count).
2. To drink 4 glasses of water every day (I’ve been doing 3 glasses, so let’s step it up a notch).
3. My snackage at night clearly is still getting in the way of my progress. So I’m cutting out soda and those damned evil potato chips.

As much as my rewards system got me exercising this week, I think I need to tweak my rewards system so that my reward doesn’t outshine the workout accomplishment. So it’s basically the same as last week except that working out rewards me ONE snack – just one. And finishing my water consumption awards me one yummy beverage that isn’t water (like juice, apple cider or a chai tea latte, not soda).

So how is your diet going this week? Anybody lose any weight worth mentioning or what I really want to know, is anybody doing WORSE than me? Go ahead, make my day. Please?