I started this little blog about 5 months ago. I still remember the early days, sitting, staring at the hit counter, willing the number to go up. I remember my first comment, who left no comment at all – I still wonder who you were phantom commenter. I remember my first meme, which I stumbled over after several months, remember watching my hit counter suddenly sky rocket, at least in comparison to my hits before. Suddenly I went from posting 6 times a month, to 6 times a day. My hit reader is currently at 2,373 and I rarely don’t get visitors now – I even get comments nearly daily – it’s amazing! I’m no dooce, but I do alright.
I’m toying with the idea of getting a domain name and maybe trying the advertising game, seeing if any pennies show up my way, but still scared of the idea, knowing I’m still small potatoes, and I might find I’d be biting off more than I could chew. To jump or not to jump? Am I BlogHer worthy yet or just another small potatoes blogger who thought she could?
Lately I’ve been playing this game in which I pretend I am a tremendously popular blogger, and trying to treat myself as such – to take myself that seriously if you will, although I suspect I like the small level of anonymity I still possess – no pressure. I’ve joined the twitter band wagon and try to be active in the blogging community – treating others as I’d have them treat me, you could say. I want people to recognize my name, and say, “Oh yeah, I love her blog. I read it every day.” Or at least something similarly nice.
Because this blogging thing, it’s pretty great. I’m not just here for the fame, although I won’t shut my door in it’s face if it ever comes knocking. No, I’m here for a few other much more important reasons, that I’ll try to lay out here:
For one, I don’t get out much – sounds silly, but it’s true. I’ve tried making mommy friends at various play dates and you know I’ve got a few up my sleeve, but I always thought, “I am so much better on paper, than the awkward bumbling girl I seem to become at these social events…” And online? I really do feel cooler, more clever and more with it – a few minutes to come up with that clever line really helps – and none of you can see when I never manage to get dressed for the day.
I love the easy community that blogging brings in – the sense of camaraderie that the blogging community delivers is bar non. (I’m still waiting for my spell check to kick in and start telling me how terrible my writing is… waiting… waiting…) The mommy blogging community is especially very wonderful to be a part of for me, because we all share one of the most incredible joys in the world – motherhood – and we also all seem to share a need to be more than that, if only in a small online way. We are mothers, we are women, we are writers, hear us roar? Do we have a theme song yet? Have your people call my people, they’ll do lunch (Oh I crack myself up…).
Blogging can be seen in a few lights – for some it is merely journaling (there you are spell check, welcome to the party! Ouch I was right, my spelling has been atrocious!) – a cathartic way of chronicling our days – and then doing it in the public eye – attempting to tell the world, “I am here. I matter. My thoughts are valuable.” And finding we are right; we are, we do, and they are. In a world where we often feel our voices go unheard, blogging is a way of putting ourselves out there, to be heard, being our own agents if you will. We are making our own first steps, allowing ourselves to be heard, whether you’d hear us or not.
Blogging also occasionally feels like journalism, something which I have a small passion for after running my college paper for a few years. I remember writing my weekly columns back then, and chuckling at myself and my own hilarity, soaking in the feel of the editorial room, reveling in my red pen. Sometimes my writing was the only stuff I wanted to read each week, though I tried to read everyone’s work. Now suddenly, years later, I find I have my own column again – I’m my whole paper this time – I can fill my blog with the content I want to read, by my own editor and publisher, and find my own audience – and I can call myself eco-friendly, as I waste no paper doing it. It’s the wave of the future.
Someday, my blog might earn me money – I can call myself a mom-trepreneur, paving my way in this world, making a name for myself – I can be more than “MM’s mom,” I can be, “mommablogsalot, fellow blogger extraordinaire” – imagine that on a business card, if you will.
When Ann Frank wrote her diary, chronicling her life – she didn’t do it so that school children everywhere could read it some day, know her name and her story and learn from it – she wrote it for herself, because she couldn’t not write it. People have been writing their stories for a long time now, and finding fortune or not because of it, ditto with fame. Blogging is just like that – we are telling our stories, feeling compelled to do so, and putting ourselves out there to the public, in this brave age of technology, where we can connect ourselves instantly with millions, and tell our stories now, while we are alive and well, or not so well as the case may be.
So why do I blog? I blog because I can. I blog because I have stories to tell, regardless of who would hear them. I blog to chronicle my life, in a sort of journal form to look back on later myself, and to share with the world if they care. I blog for my future and I blog of my past. I blog as a form of catharsis, and I blog for the community it brings me to. I blog, because I couldn’t not blog, now knowing it’s out there for the taking and the viewing and the sharing. I blog because I’m here.
Why do you blog? Or why don’t you, if that’s the case?