Aloha Friday: Thank You, No Thank You…

It’s time for another Aloha Friday, the day that you take it easy and look forward to the weekend, in Hawaii and blogland anyway. As you should know by now, over at An Island Life, Kailani decided that on Fridays she would take it easy on posting and ask a simple question for you to answer. Nothing that requires a lengthy response.

If you’d like to participate, just post your own question on your blog and leave your link at An Island Life’s blog. Don’t forget to visit the other participants! It’s a great way to make new bloggy friends!

So this week, I’d like to refer back to an entry I wrote yesterday about thank you notes. To recap for those of you who aren’t regulars, I recieved a thank you note for a wedding I went to a few weeks ago which not only got my name wrong (Jess, as opposed to my actual name, Jen) but also thanked me for a gift I did not give her.

So my question this week is:

Do you send you thank you notes? What occasions do you send them? Are there specific occasions you choose not to send them? Thoughts? Speculations?

In regards to the thank you note I recieved, do you think it would have been better she not send thank you notes at all, given she didn’t take the time to actually look at what gifts she got or who sent them? Perhaps, in her situation, you would have waited until you could look through each gift individually, or not sent a note at all? Or do you think it was a must to send a card, and quickly? Is timeliness more important than accuracy? No judging here at all, just curious what you all think of thank you notes in general. 🙂

22 responses to “Aloha Friday: Thank You, No Thank You…”

  1. xboxwife Avatar

    We try to send them for most things.


  2. cora Avatar

    I don’t usually send thank you note, but I try to call every one to say thank you


  3. Pamela Kramer Avatar

    oh yes! I send thank you notes mainly for gifts received. I sometimes have my kids draw pictures and stuff to say thank you for birthday presents or Christmas presents. Oh and a must for baby shower gifts.


  4. Jen Avatar

    My intention is always to send them out, but like most good intentions in my life, it doesn’t always happen. 😦


  5. Rach (Heart of Rachel) Avatar

    I love sending out Thank you cards to family and friends.


  6. Kailani Avatar

    I do but it seems like it’s a lost art. It’s something I insist that my children do, too.


  7. Jenni Avatar

    I do send them and I am hoping to get my kids in the habit of doing the same!


  8. acupofjoy Avatar

    Yes. I do try to send Thank Yous…I try to keep in touch!


  9. DebMomOf3 Avatar

    I don’t usually write thank you notes. I’ll thank someone in person, or make sure that my kids do, but I just never can find the time, and suddenly it’s weeks afterward and too late to send anything…


  10. Tena Avatar

    I try to send them for everything. If someone went out of their way to do something for me, or to get me something, the least I can do is sit down and write out a thank you letter!
    Great question!


  11. TheAngelForever Avatar

    I think thank you notes are very important. My mother always taught me to send them and I do to this day. I continue this with my boys. My oldest (just 5) now helps me to design cards to use for his thank you notes and signs them. Perhaps next year he will do some more. I think the art of the written word is needed for thank you notes.

    The person that sent you their card should be ashamed for such a large mistake. There really is no excuse for that.


  12. sagemom Avatar

    I always send thank you notes…and we even have DS send thank you notes to everyone too.


  13. Amy-Happy Momma Avatar

    Oh my! I write Thank you notes for most everything. My chanllenge is getting them out in a timely fashion. 😦

    If I know I will be at a party ie. my last baby shower I made Thank you cards ahead of time and had someone put each gift tag inside of an envelope this way I knew who and what. And, I had only to add their name to the heading and the item to the ending. Then I would write a personal little note if I chose to, but it really helped to have them stamped and “written” beforehand.


  14. Tara Avatar

    I always send out thank you notes. I just have this feeling that if I don’t then people don’t really understand how much I appreciate their kindness.. which usually leads me to send pictures of the kids as well lol

    I can’t believe you received one with the wrong name… that’s awkward lol


  15. Jamie Avatar

    the only time i sent thank you notes was for my wedding. and i only sent to the ones that gave gifts. since she did not take the time, i think it would have been better to not do it at all. or, she could have taken the extra time to go thru everything. how embarassing!


  16. mommablogsalot Avatar

    @ Jennifer : Definitely don’t apologize for length 🙂 It was great hearing your opinion on this subject, it seems there aren’t many people out there who still do the traditional thank you notes AND do them well. But I hope I’m wrong about that. 🙂


  17. Cathi Avatar

    I send Thank You’s all the time. I love sending snail mail and truly hope it doesn’t become a forgotten art.


  18. Jennifer: Wilson-six Avatar

    I write thank you’s for everything. I was brought up to send thank you’s for birthday and christmas and whatever else came my way. I have raised my four children to do the same.

    In this electronic age Thank you notes are a lost cause. People text and email so much that it is hard to sit down and actually write a note, stick a stamp on it and heaven forbid walk to your mailbox.

    I love stationary and collect it like I do my ribbon that I love.

    It’s sad that she got your name wrong and the gift. It might not have been her fault. In some areas of the country while the bride and groom are on the honeymoon the mother of the bride and other helpers open the gifts and make a list for the bride when she gets home. Maybe this was done for her and they goofed?

    Maybe not and she was trying to get done quickly and really goofed big time. You could always send her a note to make sure that the person that gave her the gift that she thanked you for gets a proper thank you.

    sorry this is so long. 🙂


  19. mommablogsalot Avatar

    although, I don’t write thank you notes for everything, I’m not that disciplined. But birthdays, weddings, etc. – things that don’t happen every year + birthdays is my general motto.


  20. mommablogsalot Avatar

    @ Amanda: I feel the same way and use a similar method – the gift details on the greeting card makes it so much easier. 🙂 And I love your thank you note formula – it’s brilliant. 🙂


  21. Amanda Avatar

    I send thank you notes for EVERYTHING. I set aside some time every week on Wednesdays to write them.

    Here’s my method: I write the gift details on the card in which the giver already wrote their name. In the case that it’s an impromtu gift, or a service, I write all the info on scrap paper. Easy, right?

    There’s no reason she shouldn’t have written a personal note mentioning the gift, other than the fact that you didn’t actually give her one. I think accuracy is much more important than quickness (hence the wedding thankyous haven’t all been written yet). Not getting your name right, that’s just mean, and I’d write her a card back.

    As for actual text for a thank you note, this formula works for me: Dear [name], We’re so happy that you were able to come to our [event]. It brings a smile to our faces to see you in the pictures with your [personal feature ie sunglasses or pink hair]. Thank you very much for the [gift]. You know how much we like to [verb related to gift], so it will certainly get tons of use!

    First and foremost convey appreciation for the effort guests made to attend an event.

    By highlighting a personal detail, such as the sunglasses, you say, “You’re not just two of the 200 people we invited.”

    Being specific about how a gift will be incorporated into the recipients’ lives assures the givers that their trouble and expense were worthwhile.

    Don’t repeat yourself or it will come off as filling space. Even “thank you” said over and over begins to seem less than genuine.

    Don’t stress about making every note unique. If you have many thank-yous to send, write a template that you can personalize in parts. People aren’t literally going to compare notes.