I’ve noticed a lot of the cool cats are partipating in this other fun WW meme. Rather than being wordless, the goal is to be rather wordy on a Thursday and participate in a little writer’s workshop. Really you are just responding to one or more writing prompts doled out by Mama Kat. Click here for your writing prompts. This week I am responding to the last question, in which you create a conversation involving one of the following three cartoons:
These cartoons were just so cute I couldn’t resist. Rather than choose one, I thought I’d be reckless and break the rules. Consider these three photos a 3 tile comic, telling one story. What story is that you ask? The story of love, marriage and dieting. I call it…
Mars vs. Venus: The Diet Wars
It all started out innocently enough. The cute couple you see above decided they wanted to lose weight. They were so excited – so pumped – they would work together to keep one another motivated and the weight would just fly off! And it worked. At least for one of them (in all fair honesty, if this were a true story I’d have to confess that it did work for me, too, I just happened to have a baby in the middle so it’s taking a LOT longer but still… this is a legitimate story that I hear about all the time and despite that whole baby thing, I can kind of relate to – but anyway just keep in mind this is no actual reflection of my feelings, just some humor – and hey – it’s about Mr. and Mrs. ‘Toon – not me and Dan…).
Mr. ‘Toon lost big weight, all while eating like 2500 calories a day. Meanwhile his wife, who happens to be much shorter than her husband, although you can’t tell that because Mr. ‘Toon slouches (unlike my husband), was limited to like 1200 calories a day (lucky thing I got pregnant and wasn’t stuck with that awful number). That’s barely enough for one meal at Applebees! And she’s still only lost like a fraction of what her husband has, despite the fact that both of them needed to lose the same amount of weight initially to reach their respective goals.
So one day, about a year after they started dieting, Mr. ‘Toon is feeling pretty good – he’s lost 85 pounds! He’s checking himself out in the mirror and liking what he sees!
Mr. ‘Toon: Mary, do these jeans make my butt look slimmer?
Mrs. ‘Toon: (with obvious exhasperation) No dear, that’s just you that’s slimmer.
Mr. ‘Toon: (swooning with glee) That’s right – because I lost 85 pounds! Man I look GREAT!
Mrs. ‘Toon: Uh huh.
Mr & Mrs. ‘Toon head out to the garden together.
Mr. ‘Toon: Man, it’s a beautiful day! The sun is out, the birds are chirping – and look I can almost touch my toes now!
Mrs. ‘Toon: Do you want tuna casserole for dinner?
Mr. ‘Toon: I want a tofu salad! Doesn’t that sound delicious? And so HEALTHY? Afterwards, I think I’ll run a 5k marathon!
Mrs. ‘Toon: But Grey’s Anatomy is on tonight!
Mr. ‘Toon: It will record on the DVR! Come on, come running with me tonight!
Mrs. ‘Toon: But I’m tired.
Mr. ‘Toon: I work all day at the office and I’m not tired.
Mrs. ‘Toon: Sitting in a cubicle for 9 hours playing solitaire is like a nap in the hay compared to spending the day at home chasing after our eighteen children.
(My husband doesn’t have a cubicle and probably never plays Solitaire at work. I’m pretty sure. Mr. ‘Toon is clearly a tool, but hey, she obviously loves him if she had his children 18 times!)
Anyway, Mr. ‘Toon goes to work and when he comes home that night, he is feeling awesome. Mrs. ‘Toon spent the day as described, with her eighteen children. She’s feeling like she wishes she could get hit by a truck – preferably an ice cream truck.
Mr. ‘Toon: Honey, that tuna casserole was delicious (even though I wanted a tofu salad). And I got in a 5 mile run at work on my lunch break so I thought I’d skip the marathon tonight and spend the evening with you!
Mrs. ‘Toon: You mean we can watch Grey’s Anatomy?! (suddenly happy for the first time today)
Mr. ‘Toon: (with that look in his eye – you know the one) I had something else in mind.
Mrs. ‘Toon: I don’t care if you want to watch Mythbusters. It comes on like fifty times a day – we’re watching Grey’s Anatomy and that’s final. Where’s the cookie dough?
Mr. ‘Toon: You know you’ll never lose the weight if you keep snacking at night.
Mrs. ‘Toon: I will if I only have 100 calories worth of cookie dough. I know, this because I count calories!
Mr. ‘Toon: Me, too! That’s how I lost 85 pounds!
Mrs. ‘Toon: And how I lost… twelve.
Mr. ‘Toon: So… what do you say, about tonight? ::wink::
Mrs. ‘Toon: Are you kidding – do I look like I want nineteen children?
The End!




4 responses to “Writers Workshop: Love, Marriage and Dieting (a FICTIONAL tale)”
This is hilarious. And I like how you took all of the cartoons and rolled them into one story. Very clever.
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Ha! I love this! Can totally relate, too. My hub and I embarked on a weight loss adventure before the whole preggo thing. Now he’s skinny and I’m not, but both of us are still into cookie dough.
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Very funny and creative!
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Really funny. I’m glad you broke the rules, that was awesome.
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