6 Questions To Ask Yourself

Saw this post at ZenHabits, then saw it again at my good friend FunkePunkeMonke‘s blog. It’s officially a bandwagon, and so you know I’m joining, never one to be left out of things willingly:

1. Who do I love, and what am I doing about it? If you aren’t spending time with the people you love, change that. If you are holding a grudge against a family member, let it go and reconcile. If you’ve done something to hurt a loved one, ask for forgiveness. Drop the pride, and make up. If you haven’t seen someone in awhile, call them now to set up a date.

I love my family – parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins. I love my friends. I try to see them as often as I can, but other people I love require more time from me – like my husband and son. I try to appreciate them in every way I can – and not let the “chore” of visiting people interfere with our own happiness. Sometimes if you find yourself visiting people out of habit, going out of your way out of obligation, and I’ve had to cut those events where I can. We try to see our family as much as we can, but can meaning as much as we like without going crazy, and not as much as we are physically able to. There are however friends we don’t see as much as we’d like – it’s easier to let these things slip – time and obligations get in the way. That’s why I started a monthly “Game Night” with my friends – where they have a standing invitation to come over for pizza and fun. Some months only a couple people show up, other months it’s a full house. Either way, it’s always a good time and we’re happy knowing we’ve made an effort to socialize with people we love.

2. Am I pursuing my dream, or is fear stopping me? What have you always wanted to do? Maybe something you dreamed of as a child but have given up as unrealistic? Maybe something you still want to do but are afraid of failing? What fears are stopping you? And what would be the worst that could happen if you overcame those fears and pursued your dream?

If you’re already pursuing your dream, pat yourself on the back. You’re doing awesome!

At the moment I think I am pursuing the dreams I’m able to – being a mother and a wife and doing all of the “family” things I didn’t really get to do, growing up an only child with a single working father. We vacation together, we spend time being lazy together, we laugh together. I love it. I’d love to travel more and I want to own our own home, but these are things which can only happen with time and preparation. We are doing the best we can.

I would like to focus more attention to writing eventually, but I can’t very well write when I have nothing to write about – I’m already blogging, something I began about 6 months ago – which is more than I could say before that.

3. Am I doing something that matters? There’s a difference between doing work, and doing work that really matters. Much of the time, we use up the few days we have on this earth with busy-work, stuff that doesn’t make much difference, and that’s sadly a waste of our lives.

I’m home and there for my children, and I think that matters more than anything. I do want to do more charity work, but right now I’m trying to enjoy my time with my young son and focus on that.

4. What am I doing to help others? Kind of ironically, you get the most out of life not just by taking what you can for yourself, but by giving to others. What have you done lately to help people out? Have you been kind to people? Have you been compassionate? Have you been there for anyone? Listened? Volunteered for those in need? If you’re not doing anything to help others, this is a good time to figure out one thing you can do for someone, and put it into action. Ask this question on a regular basis, and you’ll make kindness a habit.

I don’t do as much charity work as I’d like, but I am providing very cheap (often free) childcare for a friend in need – it isn’t always easy or fun, and it gets stressful, but I know it means a lot to her and that she’d be struggling much more without me.

5. Am I as good a person as I want to be? I ask this of myself all the time. Sometimes, when I’m impatient or selfish or less-than-helpful, I think back on what I’ve said and done and realize that I could have done better. Instead of beating myself up about it, I endeavor to try harder, to remember to allow my better angels to guide me, to rise above the trivialities of life to a higher plane.

There is always room for improvement but overall I think I’m a good person with a kind heart, always striving to be better, which I consider another  good thing.

6. What am I doing to live life with passion, health and energy? You can do all the right things, and yet live a life that’s dull and sluggish. If you let your health go, you will have little energy and you will waste the minutes you have left on illness. Instead, learn to live a healthy life, with good foods and exercise. This will lead to more energy in your life. And then direct that energy into something you’re passionate about.

This is definitely something to work on. I’ve started a diet with Jen @ Daily Mish Mash and it’s helping in small ways but there’s a long way to go.

Are you living the best life you can?

One response to “6 Questions To Ask Yourself”

  1. Ruth Avatar

    I’m glad to have found your blog (via the T13 site) and I especially loved this post. I also stay home with my kids, want to write more, started blogging about 6 months ago and I find it very satisfying. I love ZenHabits. This is a great list of questions, and my answers would be similar to yours.
    I love the idea of inviting friends over for game night. I think I am going to have to try that!