Sometimes when I’m on the internet I read something that is so amazing, clever, refreshing, heartbreaking, informative, special, memorable, adorable or some mixture of the lot that I think, “Thank god for the internet – bringing us all closer together.” Sometimes when I am talking to a loved one online that would be difficult to talk to offline, I am so so grateful for the technology that offers me just such a luxury. The internet can be an amazing source of news, communication, information and – well, let’s face it – distractions. I am grateful for it.
But sometimes the distractions and the information, communication and clutter feel overwhelming to me. Sometimes the world feels a little too small and the sheer amount of sad news that you cannot help but trip over online is deafening. Sometimes there is so much bad news, so much drama (personal or political) that my soul feels numb to it. Like there is a limit to how much information my heart can take in before it shuts down and declares that it’s had enough.
It’s not that the news is any less sad than the other ten million sad stories – or that the drama is no less deserving of speculation and compassionate support. But some days I just cannot do it. I don’t want to hear it and I can not bear to add my own thoughts to these conversations – to voice my opinion at an ocean of people who may or may not agree with me that are all clamoring to have their voices heard. I’ve heard it all, some days. And some days there just doesn’t seem to be anything left to say.
Maybe tomorrow those voices will not sound so stale. That feeling of being underwater, watching the world tumble by from below will vanish and my heart will not balk at the notion of more. Maybe an hour from now I will read a story that truly resonates with me in a way that cannot be ignored and I’ll find myself back on a soap box with the rest of the world, impassioned and earnest and oblivious of how cliched it can all feel – maybe I’ll be able to silence that voice inside of me that keeps saying, “Haven’t we already read this one? Haven’t we played this game before?”
Maybe I’m just feeling a little off after being stuck at home for several days with a sprained foot – maybe the winter doldrums are just wreaking havoc on my normally sunny disposition. Maybe we should ignore this post and get back to our Farmvilles and Instagrams and the latest Crazy News Blurb that’s taking our Facebook feed by storm. You know the one.